making the centre a home

1. Home efficiency

- it's not an accumulation of services

- this happens when we see people as functions instead of persons

- when militia overshadows family, it becomes effective but cold

- high number of to-do lists could make us neglect marital friendship

2. The logic of Controlling situation 

- excessively focus on controlling situations

- too much focus on ideal homes

- then neglecting the family-children ties, drive them up 

3. Logic of merit

Meriting and expecting appreciation and compensation

- we should not be expecting compensation for loving our wife or children. Yes it's good to. But it shouldnt be a habit. 

- develop feeling of not being appreciated and sacrifice isn't worth it. 

- if we were expecting compensation, it's like the elder brother in prodigal son

4. Logic of sentiment 

- we have a criteria of evaluate family life but looking at our sentiment. Does it make me feel good?

- even though emotional well being is an indicator, it shouldnt be fundamental in contributing to family life.

Remedies of missteps

A. Understand that the Logic of service is the Logic of gift

- you receive without pay, give without pay

- no matter how much we give, its nothing as we compare to our Lord 

B. Our Lord is in charge

Unless the Lord build the house, it is built in vain.

If we focus on our Lord, we aren't affected by nuances 

C. Each person has irreplaceable role in building a home

- the sick and children have a special role in this 

-they allow us to be cared of 

- the weakest link can be unifying force of the family